"Don't ask what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. - Howard Thurman"
Ever since I remember I have the urge to know more about the people crossing my path. This paired with my above average interest in the well-being of my friends and family and my father being a coach, I decided to study psychology.
I joined a fraternity as it seemed a lot of fun and in the society I grew up in this was the way to go. In my third year, I started teaching first year students to earn extra points as I was risking not passing my studies. I learned a lot about myself in this period. For the first time, my strengths and weaknesses were highlighted by the people I worked with.
That same summer, a friend of mine told me he wasn't feeling comfortable around me anymore. This was my wake-up call; I felt drained and needed to take responsibility in my life. I spent my student years drinking, partying and totally losing sight of myself. This was the start of my journey to feel alive again.
“We are scared for all the bad stuff on the road and this actually keeps us from experiencing the good.”
5 THINGS ABOUT TOM
Entrepreneur | CONNECTer | Vision developer | Silence | KULA
“I become quiet and see what comes up. That’s what I listen to.
LEAP OF FAITH
After graduating I asked people around me what my next step should be. I took other people's truth as mine; like many people do especially straight after uni. I had no idea what to do and accepted a recruiter position in a renowned recruitment agency. After 1,5 year I found myself dragging myself to work every day. I was bored and on the verge of burning out. I started my days wanting to go to bed again. Against the advice of most people around me, I quit my job without a proper plan.
“It felt like I had an old-fashioned divers helmet on my head. The world around me seemed cloudy and I couldn’t hear or feel it all too well.”
With the help of a holistic masseuse I removed the self-imposed pressure and began to see clearly.
I started doing all kinds of jobs and taking things on board that felt right for me - not necessarily looking at my career path. I used my interpersonal skills to advise and coach small companies in a way that felt right to me.
For a couple of years I spent a lot of time reflecting and focusing on myself. The tiredness didn’t disappear just like that so I started exploring different methods of healing and found very skilled and exceptional people on my path from different backgrounds and disciplines.
These people really believed in my ability and coached me to recognize and use my strengths in my professional life. I started eating well, meditating, and took a lot of rest.
I knew I always had a good connection and understanding of people, it was intuitive to me and had permeated my studies and my career up until this point. During my studies this seemed a curse, I took all energies from people around me and overlooked what I truly felt. When I discovered my high sensitivity and received the tools to work with it, the curse became my gift.
I took my skillset along with my own personal journey to coach people into finding their own path. My coaching helps people to create their own personal visions, allowing them to ask themselves who they truly are, what they are naturally good at, what they want to do and how they can achieve that. I help them think beyond their own limits of degrees and financial restraints to find their natural life path trusting on their feeling of aliveness.
“Doing something you feel you should do is different than doing something you think you should do.”
I began by setting up a website called ‘a whole life’, since I felt whole again and wanted to share my story to inspire and help others.
After all these inspirational talks and dinners and being connected to groups like KULA, I had built a really amazing network of people around me. A diverse group of people willing to help and assist each other in their projects. It was due to this network that people started finding me through word-of-mouth. My story and services have begun to spread as people have become more intrigued about finding their own path too.
“Every experience helps bringing you closer to what your calling is in life.”
THE TOUGH TIMES
Working for yourself means there is no consistent stability compared to a 9 to 5 job. Follow your heart when you truly feel you have to do something. Just start and see where it takes you. It’s not always easy and you will often feel alone.
For now the toughest part is the financial uncertainty. I feel I have to make sacrifices to grow. It means I can’t join in all the social matters or do some stuff I am also passionate about. But I am doing what I truly love and my work is worth it all!
“Invest in yourself now. If you think about spending your savings later I would advise to spend it now so you can build the you that you truly desire and make an income in the future with the real you.”
THE MONEY TALK
I had money saved to be able to live for 3 months without working. My projects are all in their early stages right now and nothing is certain with regards to income in my life.
"I’m living in deep trust in myself and what I do and became more comfortable with uncertainties."
It helps to be aware of your feelings towards money. If worrying about money makes you anxious then you have to find a way of dealing with it. If the worry about money paralyzes you than you have to work on that worry first.
I make sure I have enough money to live for two months. This works for me. You have to find what works for you. I know that if the anxiety is getting too much I have to focus on doing things that can lead to generating an income.
5 INSIDER TIPS
- Discover your own truth, create space to discover your own true thoughts and feelings.
- Surround yourself with like-minded people, this will inspire you but also assist you with beginning new projects.
- Don’t be afraid to show your true self and speak to others about it, your problems will alleviate quicker allowing you to move forward.
- It is never too late to realize your strengths and change the path you carve for yourself.
- Give your inner critic space and your imagination even more; dream big.
“If you show your true self then you start to attract people that like you as you are, and that is when the magic happens.”
Initiatives Tom is involved in | KULA | Start Your Business on a Boat | De ruimte in (NL)
Tom is a dear friend of mine and has been invaluable in my own journey. Tom opens, nurtures and uplifts you - he is the purest of mankind. We recently started working together and he is the first person I would recommend everyone on search for purpose in life. What do you really want to do every day? Tom has the tools to crack you open and make you understand that the world needs you to come alive. Goes without saying that he is one of a kind and I am truly blessed to have Tom as a friend.
Photography by Stephania Karathanasi